// THE LABORATORY //


On Monday morning, I had a cold. It started in with a thickness to my throat when breathing. But as I rose and started to clamor about the cell, I realized my nose was running.

An irritating running that was more an inconvenience than a sign of true illness.

Autumn came in to deliver my breakfast that morning.

KEVIN

I’D LIKE TO SEE THE DOCTOR TODAY.

AUTUMN

YOU WON’T BE ABLE TO SEE HIM UNTIL THIS EVENING. HE’S NOT AT THIS LOCATION AT THIS CURRENT TIME.

KEVIN

I SEE.

WELL, I HAVE A COLD TODAY.

AUTUMN

YOU HAVE A COLD?

WHAT ARE YOUR SYMPTOMS?

KEVIN

MY THROAT IS SCRATCHY AND MY NOSE IS RUNNING.

AUTUMN

PERHAPS YOU’LL ALLOW ME JUST A MOMENT TO GET MY SUPPLIES…

I’D LIKE TO TAKE A SAMPLE –


I had already made up my mind concerning this matter.

KEVIN

NO! NEVER!!


She softens her posture and comes toward me with gentle hands.

AUTUMN

NOW, KEVIN.

DON’T FIGHT, PLEASE.

WE’RE JUST TRYING TO TREAT YOUR COLD.

YOU’RE FAR TOO SUSPICIOUS OF US. THERE’S NOTHING WE CAN DO TO HURT YOU WITH JUST A SIMPLE SAMPLE –

KEVIN

I’LL FIGHT AND KEEP FIGHTING.

AUTUMN

NOW WHY DID YOU BRING IT UP IF YOU WEREN’T WILLING TO SUBMIT TO EVEN A SWABBING?

KEVIN

I WANTED TO SEE THE DOCTOR.

AUTUMN

I TOLD YOU THAT’S NOT POSSIBLE UNTIL LATER TODAY.

KEVIN

YES. I AM AWARE.


She turns to face a desolate wall for a moment, exasperated with her failure.

AUTUMN

THIS ISN’T HOW WE’LL BE ABLE TO GET YOU BETTER.


I had my back up and was prepared to resist. But she seemed defeated.

KEVIN

I DON’T WANT TO GET BETTER.

AUTUMN

WE WANT YOU TO GET BETTER.

KEVIN

I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU WANT.

AUTUMN

I’M SORRY YOU FEEL THAT WAY, KEVIN.


There is no point continuing down this rabbit hole. I stop talking and she soon leaves the room in a cloud of uncertainty.

TRELAINE

DID YOUR FATHER EVER READ TO YOU THE STORY OF DRACULA?

KEVIN

NO, I CAN’T SAY I’M FAMILIAR.

TRELAINE

THEN YOU’RE UNFORTUNATELY NOT FAMILIAR WITH THE LEGEND OF SCHOLOMANCE.

THAT WAS WHERE HE LEARNED IT: BLOOD MAGIC.

THE POWER OVER LIFE AND DEATH.


But I did not follow.

He changes the subject.

TRELAINE

THE NURSE WAS TELLING ME THAT YOU WERE ASKING AFTER RECONSTRUCTIVE DENTISTRY.

KEVIN

I WASN’T.

BUT I DO HAVE A COLD.

TRELAINE

PROBABLY A REACTION TO THE CHANGE OF ENVIRONMENT.

THE CHANGE IN AIR, IF YOU WILL.


He seemed unwilling, or unable to do anything about my cold.

At least he wasn’t offering to swab at my nose.

TRELAINE

THAT’S ALWAYS BEEN MY TRAINING, YOU KNOW, AS A DOCTOR.

IT’S A PROFESSION FOR WHICH I’VE ALWAYS HAD IMMENSE FONDNESS.

KEVIN

WHY?

TRELAINE

I WANT TO HELP THE VAMPIRES OF THE WORLD.

YOUR FAMILY TAUGHT YOU ABOUT THEM, DID THEY NOT?


Yes, I had come across the Vampire in the Monster Manual.

TRELAINE

I WANT TO HELP THEM SEE THE LIGHT.


I pause a moment.

KEVIN

WOULDN’T THAT BE…ANATHEMA TO THEM?

TRELAINE

YOU’RE VERY FUNNY.

HAVE A DRINK WITH ME, KEVIN.

KEVIN

I’M TWELVE YEARS OLD.

TRELAINE

ALMOST THIRTEEN, IF I’VE HEARD CORRECTLY.

KEVIN

WHAT’S YOUR POINT?

TRELAINE

WHAT’S YOUR POINT?

I OFFERED YOU A SPOT OF BRANDY BECAUSE YOU’RE VERY NEARLY A MAN AND THERE’S SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT I’D LIKE TO DISCUSS WITH YOU.

KEVIN

YOU’VE ALREADY DISCUSSED YOUR PROJECT WITH ME.


The Doctor Trelaine removes a second glass from the small cupboard and pours a finger of the rosy liquid. He pushes the cup across the table toward me.

TRELAINE

TAKE IT OR DON’T TAKE IT; IT MAKES NO DIFFERENCE TO ME.

I WANTED TO TALK ABOUT YOUR TEETH.

ONE OF MY AREAS OF CONCENTRATION IS THE FIELD OF DENTISTRY.

SO MUCH OF WHAT MAKES US WHO WE ARE RESTS IN OUR TEETH.


I did not want to talk about my teeth.

TRELAINE

THE NURSE SAID SHE TALKED TO YOU ABOUT –

KEVIN

I DO NOT THINK MY TEETH ARE A MINOR BIRTH DEFECT.


He is slightly surprised at my interruption, and allows time for the room to breathe.

TRELAINE

NO…PERHAPS NOT.

THEY ARE UNUSUAL.

YOUR MOTHER WAS OF ADVANCED AGE WHEN YOU WERE CREATED.

EVEN FOR A SORCERESS.


Did I know Mother’s birthyear? I combed through my nascent thoughts.

TRELAINE

DO YOU KNOW HOW OLD YOUR MOTHER WAS WHEN YOU WERE BORN?


I look at him and his eyes flash through shining moisture.

TRELAINE

SHE WAS OVER EIGHTY YEARS OLD.

TWICE THAT OF A MORTAL’S CHILDBEARING YEARS.


Mother could work magic. Didn’t that count for anything?

TRELAINE

IT IS UNUSUAL, ESPECIALLY FOR A MAGE SUCH AS HERSELF YET TO DEVELOP HER AMBROSIA.

IT IS ENTIRELY POSSIBLE SHE’S NOT YOUR MOTHER AT ALL.


At this, I stood up and pushed the chair out with my straightening legs. I could not sit for such an accusation.

KEVIN

HOW DARE YOU!

HOW DARE YOU!!


In some sort of defensive posture, he seems to shrug his shoulders.

TRELAINE

I’M SORRY FOR OFFENDING YOU.

IT WAS IDLE SPECULATION.

I WASN’T UNDER THE IMPRESSION YOU HAD SUCH A STRONG ATTACHMENT TOWARD HER.

KEVIN

I’LL NOT SUFFER –

TRELAINE

I’M SORRY, I’M SORRY; MY DEEPEST CONDOLENCES FOR SPEAKING OUT OF LINE REGARDING YOUR FAMILY TREE. I SHOULD KNOW BETTER THAN TO SPEAK ON THINGS ON WHICH I HAVE NO AUTHORITY.


I slowly make motion to sit again.

TRELAINE

IT DOES NOT MATTER, OF COURSE.

I WAS JUST ADMIRING YOUR TEETH AND REMARKING ON THEIR STRANGENESS.

YOU SEE, ONE OF THE MANY SERVICES I PROVIDE FOR THE VAMPIRES I COUNT AMONGST MY FRIENDS ARE CLEANINGS BUT ALSO REALIGNMENTS.

I’D LIKE TO STRAIGHTEN YOUR TEETH, KEVIN.

YOUR SILHOUETTE SEEMS TO BE A SOURCE OF PAIN IN YOUR SELF-REGARD.

WE CAN IMPROVE THAT.

I’VE DONE THE SAME FOR MANY A YOUNG VAMPIRE.

KEVIN

I’M NOT A VAMPIRE.


The Doctor seems to choose carefully the words with which he replies.

TRELAINE

NO, YOU’RE NOT A VAMPIRE.

BUT YOU HAVE A MOUTH FULL OF RAGGED TEETH.

HALF-AGAIN MORE THAN YOU NEED TO DEFEAT A ROAST BEEF SANDWICH.

LET ME SET THEM STRAIGHT AGAIN.

DO ME THE HONOR OF ALLOWING ME TO WORK ON YOU.


If I’d had a spare moment, I would have run my tongue over the familiar surface of my teeth, feeling each, some sharp, some less, but each anything but a Mortal’s chunk of dentin.

I, too, carefully measure my response.

KEVIN

LET ME ASK MY PARENTS.

TRELAINE

YOU’RE GETTING A FAIR BIT TOO OLD FOR SUCH THINGS.

IT’S TIME FOR YOU TO MAKE YOUR OWN DECISIONS.

KEVIN

I WAS BORN THIS WAY.

TRELAINE

AND YET, YOU DETEST YOUR APPEARANCE.

YOU SHUN MIRRORS AND WON’T OPEN YOUR MOUTH IN FRONT OF YOUR WINDOWPANE.


It was certainly true that my cell contained a particularly troublesome mirror over the sink that seemed to cast its reflection over the entire room.

Avoiding the mirror’s gaze was easier said than done in that small space.

If Mother had offered to fix my teeth, that would’ve been one thing. But in captivity? Sedated and poked at like some kind of science experiment?

KEVIN

YOU’RE JUST TRYING TO STEAL THEM.

MY TEETH.

TRELAINE

THIS IS COMPLETELY SEPARATE FROM MY WORK ON THE GENOME.

AND IN FACT YOUR TEETH WOULD PROVIDE VERY LITTLE HELP TO US ON THAT FRONT.

THE TEETH ARE COMPOSED OF THICK DEPOSITS OF MINERAL.

THEY’RE NOT EVEN BONE, WHERE BONE IS LACED THROUGHOUT WITH TINY BLOOD VESSELS.

THE TEETH ARE PURE.


I look back at him. He seems enraptured by his sermon.

TRELAINE

YOU’LL WANT YOUR TEETH TO BE FUNCTIONAL, IF –

OR WHEN –

KEVIN

‘WHEN’ WHAT?

TRELAINE

YOU AWAKEN AS A VAMPIRE.

YOUR TIME AS A CHILD WILL DRAW TO A CLOSE AND THE HUNGER WILL SET IN.

NOT UNLIKE WHAT YOU’VE EXPERIENCED, BUT FAR, FAR MORE VITAL.

YOUR EVERY FIBER WILL OSCILLATE WITH NEED, WITH DESIRE.

FOR THE HUNT.

KEVIN

IS THAT WHAT YOU ARE THEN?

A VAMPIRE?

TRELAINE

AND YOUR FATHER, TOO.

THOUGH THE NATURE OF HIS CURSE DIFFERENT THAN MINE.

YOU’LL WANT TEETH THAT FUNCTION, THAT PIERCE THE FLESH NEATLY, AND DO NOT RAVAGE.

A STRAIGHT LINE OF TEETH WITH A PREDATOR’S CUSPIDS.

WHETHER OR NOT YOU CHOOSE TO JOIN US, YOUR DAYS OF YOUTH ARE DRAWING TO A CLOSE.

EVEN YOUR FATHER MAY THANK US FOR THE WORK WE HAVE DONE.

IT SEEMS HE’S POWERLESS TO SET THEM STRAIGHT HIMSELF.


The alcohol was beginning to take effect and I felt dizzy.

KEVIN

MY FATHER IS A POWERFUL MAN.

TRELAINE

YES, CERTAINLY.

BUT HE’S NO DOCTOR.